Im so lonely and tired of making new friends -its superficial and a past time

You sound so very sad- you must have been through a tremendous loss. In another post you talked about PTSD..I dont know what happened but I do know you are not alone & you came to the right place for support. It sounds like you are the midst of an incredible amount of grief and pain. Im curious what resources you do have right now that can help you get through this time and to heal. If you can try to get outside once a day- its simply therapuetic; try to focus on something that entertains you in some way & gives you some respite from your pain (i.e. a book, movie, magazine, craft..etc).

Warmly,
Kellie Montgomery, LMFT

When u write that you have not come to grips with your reality- I am curious what that means...you seem to greatly understand, feel, regret, grieve and lament what has happened to you. My guess is that you mean you have not bee able to mourn fully or come to any form of acceptance. I do not know your situation but this is my guess of what you meant. So often we think that if we wallow in our pain we will fully understand it, and then we will simply 'get it' and be able to move on. With our minds, our thoughts can have rapid fire statements that cut us down in seconds, as well as feelings that take hold of us like gravity. Research has found that there really is only so much talking we can do about our thoughts and feelings until it stops being therapuetic and becomes unhealthy. This is why there are client who can tell you everything about their pain, their diagnosis, reasons why and why not, how and how come..but they feel a sort of hollowness....we can dwell so much on our problems and figuring them out only to feel no relief. We forget that in feeling better we have to do things and think things and act in ways that are positive and correspond with feeling better. In my own life, I spent years and years dwelling on how unhappy I was and figuring out why, how come and where I went wrong, what I could of had and why I didnt- only to come up with more questions and questions, leading down a rabbit hole of hell..and keeping me there.

I dont know your background unfortunately, but if you have PTSD, then you can definately feel stuck- and its really important to see a professional for trauma who can help you to heal.

Warmly,
Kellie Montgomery< LMFT

honey how did you end up there away from your lovedones? Is it military? Or a job? Its so hard to make friends and then trust them when you've been hurt. But I am praying God introduces you to a wonderful new friend and ally there. While you are getting use to your surroundings and neighborhood, I can understand that it might feel uncomfortable or even scarry to go for a walk in a new neighborhood....so that might not be possible yet. But many things you mentioned can help. Do you like to paint, draw or color? Yes...color! I have done this as silly as it is and it helped me thru some very dark times. There are others on here that color too. It appeals to your crafty side and distracts the mind. I filled up a 300 page book myself. I also journal and write. I have a book with 200 pages already. I love history so i'm writting about the 1830s. you will be surprised as to how easy it is and how much fun! I am praying for you and will be here whenever you need me! I'm glad you are reaching out to us so we can be there for you hun.